Most times we find ourselves trying to
live up to the expectation of one person or the other. It could be our father,
mother, brother, sister, spouse, mentor or even a celebrity. It is often
because we look up to that person a lot. We are happy when they approve of a
decision we make or when we believe if we were to meet that person on the road,
he/she will give us a nod of approval; that’s in the case of looking up to a
person we idolize. The approval of a decision could be in any form; for a
father, it could be studying the course he wants you to at college level. For a
mother, it could be marrying the dream man/woman she has often described to her
child. For your brother or sister, it could be living your life the way they
live theirs, believing you should follow their footsteps. For your spouse, it
could be trying to be the perfect partner for them. For a celebrity we idolize,
it could be dressing the way they do or living our life the way they live
theirs. The list is endless.
The question I am asking here is this, is
it healthy to try and live up to someone’s expectation regardless of who that
person is? What do I stand to gain if I keep trying to be the perfect person
for everyone? Family, friends, society, colleagues, etc. Am I living a
happy and fulfilled life? How can I truly be happy and successful when am
trying to please, respect and be polite to everyone I come across? I think we
should talk about what it means to be happy and successful; that would be
another topic. For now let’s focus on trying to live up to other people’s
expectation.
By the time we realize we have been
living our life based on what is expected of us from the society, family and
friends, it is usually too late as the years would have passed us by, you might
even have grey hairs already. But it is never too late to realize yourself and
start living for you. Yes you may be married and have children or you may be a
grandmother by now, you have a job or business to run, you may be the
breadwinner for the family, internal and external, you most likely have too
many responsibilities to cater to. You probably even have high blood pressure
already from wanting to meet up to all your responsibilities.
If you find yourself doing this, I want
you to take a sit, relax and ask yourself this, what if I die tonight? Life will
go on my brother and sister. You as a person isn’t thinking about what you
really want from this life that has been given to you and you alone on a
platter of gold. You have done well for yourself in a cruel world. Take a
moment to appreciate you and where you are. Learn to work and live in a relaxed
manner. Don’t get stressed up. Don’t be worried about any matter, after-all
every problem has an expiry date and if it doesn’t the more reason not to worry
but live each moment a happy person. There are 24 hours in a day and what you
do with that time is entirely up to you. Every individual has his/her own
dreams, vision, goals, mission in life. And it is true you can only go as far
as your imaginations take you. So would you spend your 24hours trying to live
up to the world’s expectation or would you rather spend it living up to your
own expectations.
Change the way you think today and start
living for you….there is a part in your imaginative mind where you are dunking
basketball like a star, what are you waiting for? A miracle? You wake up one
morning and become like Dwyane Wade. Snap out of it, it isn’t going to happen. Do
yourself a favour, buy a ball and start practising even if you can only afford
15mins out of your 24hours per day to practicalize your dream. Never give up,
you never know who is watching or when you might need to put the skills you are
trying to perfect to good use or a good cause. To give up is to live to people’s
expectation, to never give up is living for yourself. You are UNIQUE. No one
can be YOU. That’s a certain fact. So what would you do with YOU?
